It Works Just Fine, by Chloe Djilani

Kind, clever, bright.

Too bright.

So bright she adhered herself like wax to the people responsible for such knowledge every year.

She didn’t, however, want to think too deeply about why that was.

She hides behind the promise of visits, but never really does.

It started; a game of stepping back, analyzing herself,

then stepping again into reality to change as her visions see fit.

The characters like to stand up from their pages and whisper their take.

She often hides behind the witty improv they supply her with.

She wonders if she’s supposed to be where she is:

the stage she loves so dearly like

a pedestal that she refuses to put herself on.

All the other winners up there with her, their prize the same,

yet in the back of her mind,

Doubt.

The girl remembers

in 7th grade when the grade collectively decided not to tell her

it was national “Give Your Girl Your Hoodie” day

because her “boyfriends’” hoodie

would not have fit her.

She hides in her thrifted clothes, a size too big.

And she remembers

that one concert when she and another boy soloed in

“Here Comes The Sun”

when all her friends and family could talk about was how good he was.

She hides in unending confidence.

She hides behind her passions – it’s easy enough.

She likes to be told how others perceive her,

to make sure she’s presenting herself exactly how she wants to be seen.

I have to tweak some things here or there but mostly it works fine.

Yes.

It works just fine.